I’ve been married to my lovely wife Heather for almost 4 years now. We had our first child, my beautiful baby girl Cora, 11 months ago. I can honestly say it’s been a real blessing for me.

You know what else I love besides those two? GUITARS.

Here are 8 tips on how to acquire more instruments without tipping off your significant other…

  1. Keep more cases and gig bags than necessary for your instrument collection. That way if you decide you need to add one more, you can simply insert it into an empty space in your case collection!
  2. Learn to love guitar parts. You can literally buy them one piece at a time until you have slowly constructed yourself a new one! It’s much easier to smuggle in a small piece at a time for a month or two than sneak in a full size telecaster.
  3. Fabricate a membership card to a secret guitar library that lets you “check out” pieces. Works like a charm.
  4. Buy a light dimmer for your guitar room. Then if she spots a new one, just say it’s one you’ve had that looks different with the lights dimmed.
  5. Maintain that all your opaque finished guitars feature a chameleon paint job that changes depending on the particular angle and lighting.
  6. Buy guitars in colors that match her outfits. Or shoes. Or her eyes, you lady killer!
  7. Create a support group with several of your guitar player friends. Then just “lend” some to one friend and “borrow” some from another.
  8. Learn to do guitar tech work and take the occasional job fixing up a guitar. Then you can hang “repair tags” on guitars. “It’s not mine babe, it’s just for work!”

Obviously this is sarcasm. Don’t say I didn’t warn you….you lady killer.

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Mike Burstein
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WOW!! That’s a really good way to ruin that marriage dude. Think about what you are teaching your child to do. Lie Cheat Steal decive as long as it benifits you who care? Right? WRONG!!!

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